Help
by kalakat08
Summary: Nico didn't notice Jason had stopped talking. Or Jason touching his arm. Or Jason staring at the red blots appearing on his sleeve. The one fucking day he didn't wear black. Dark themes but still fluffy. WARNING: self harm


**Characters belong to Rick Riordan**

**Please follow, favorite, and review! sorry for any spelling/grammar mistakes, auto correct can be stupid sometimes**

Nico looked down at the blade in his hand. He knew if Jason found out what he was doing he would be furious, but Nico didn't have any more options. Taking a deep breath he lowered the edge to his alabaster skin, and slashed it across the smooth surface. He gasped and watched in fascination as the blood rose from beneath his skin and dripped down his arm. He smiled and repeated the motion again and again on his wrist. Nico couldn't stop watching the blood pouring down his arms, puddling on the floor, soaking into the thin fabric of his shirt. As he cut, Nico imagined each scar signifying a problem.

Slice

Outcast

Slice

Why did Bianca leave me?

Slice

Hazel

Slice

Hades... Father?... Dad?

Slice

Percy Jackson

Slice

Eating

Slice

Sleeping

Slice

... Breathing

_So many,_ he thought to himself as he finally lowered the knife. _Too many for a 15 year old_. He didn't realize he was crying until he noticed the tears mixing with the crimson, creating a gross watery pink color. Quickly wiping at his eyes, he stood and walked towards the bathroom. Although Jason knew one of his secrets, he wasn't going to find out about the others. Nico was determined to keep this from him, no matter what.

After the war with Gaea ended, Hazel had gone back to new Rome with Frank while Jason stayed behind. True to his word, Nico left the same day Hazel did, to the underworld. His _home. _A week later he ended up back at Camp Half Blood. He had decided it was time to settle down, build real friendships that he would have for the rest of his life, etc. At least that's what Nico told Chiron after he accidentally shadow traveled into his chambers. Really he just couldn't stand to stay in the underworld anymore. Hades was becoming unbearable and being that close to Tartarus scared Nico. He needed a place to stay until he could figure out his next move, Camp Half Blood seemed like the perfect place. He had hoped that he would go unnoticed and when he was ready to leave, he would be completely forgotten by the other campers.

The only problem with his plan was Jason Grace.

"Hey"

Nico looked up from where he was cleaning his sword and nodded his head in acknowledgement towards Jason.

"A few of us were gonna go into the city for pizza, do you wanna come?"

"I'm fine, thank you."

Jason sighed before lowering himself to the ground. He had been trying for a few weeks to get Nico to open up to him, so far no success.

"When you told me you were coming back to camp, I thought you might actual try to participate in these...things"

Nico kept his eyes on the ground still focused on his sword, but spoke back to Jason.

"What _things_ Jason?"

"Socializing Nico! You don't talk to anybody unless you have to and I don't see you go to any lessons or practices..." He laid down and rested his head against the tree Nico was camped out under. "Not to mention you avoiding Percy at all costs..." He muttered under his breath. Jason immediately regretted saying those words. The shadows he was sheltered under suddenly felt very unwelcoming, and the air temperature dropped a few degrees. Jason quickly looked to see Nico's reaction and flinched at what he saw. His face was expressionless but his jaw was tense and his eyes burned black fire. He was staring down at Jason and spoke in a tense tone.

"We are not talking about this right now."

Jason knew he should be quiet and let it go but, he couldn't.

"When are we going to talk about it then? I know you still like him, I see the way you stare at him. If you would just tell me how to help yo-"

"I DONT NEED YOUR HELP."

Nico's outburst created cracks in the ground and even drew the attention of a few campers nearby. He heaved a sigh and began to stand up, signifying the end of their conversation.

"Have fun in the city tonight." Was all he said before he quickly walked away towards his cabin, rubbing his right wrist.

That night, Nico sat on his bed in cabin 13 dressing his old wounds. They started bleeding today when he rubbed his arm against the table by accident, luckily no one saw. As he finished wrapping the last bandage around his wrist, someone knocked on the door. Nico quickly shoved the materials under his pillow and adjusted his shirt sleeve so nothing could be seen. Walking to the door, Nico already had a strong sense of who was there. He grimaced slightly, when he saw Jason Grace standing outside in all his glory. His hair was perfect and his eyes were wide awake despite the fact that it was almost 11 PM. He was wearing purple plaid pajama bottoms and a baggy white t-shirt.

"Can I come in?"

Nico grumbled a yes and stood aside to let Jason in. He seemed a bit surprised to see the lack of furniture in the cabin. All that was there was a large bed, a nightstand, and a separate door that led to the bathroom. Jason started laughing a bit causing Nico to frown at him.

"It's nothing, just, I have a huge statue of my dad in my cabin and I just confirmed that I seem to be the only one with a monument of my parent."

"This wasn't here before, I built it last summer." Nico stated. It came out a lot harsher than he wanted it to, abruptly stopping Jason's laughter.

"Sorry, I'm just tired..."

"It's alright... So what did you do this afternoon?"

Jason sat on his bed and stared up at him with a relaxed expression. Nico must have looked confused because Jason added, "you know, because you didn't come get pizza with us, I figured you were busy."

Nico nodded and tried to look calm, but in his head he was scrambling for a logical excuse. He was normally great at lying but something about Jason unsettled him. It felt so wrong to lie infront of someone so righteous and honest.

"Well...I was ugh-practicing."

Jason nodded and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "You know, that's funny because I asked Clarisse if she saw you in the arena and she said you didn't come in at all today."

"That's because I don't train in the arena."

"Where do you train then?"

"In...the woods."

"Where in the woods?"

"By the beach."

"You're lying!"

Jason had risen from the bed and was standing over Nico, trying to look intimidating as he questioned him.

"How do you even know that?!"

Nico was starting to get annoyed and in a few minutes was going to shadow travel to Japan or something, just to get away from Jason.

"I know because Percy spends all day at the beach and he would have seen you." Nico was about to open his mouth and protest but Jason interrupted him, "don't lie Nico, I talked to him about and he said he never saw you."

Nico's blood was boiling, why did Jason care so freaking much?!

"What do you want from me, Jason? an apology?"

"I want you to tell me why you're here."

Nico was at a loss for words which allowed Jason to begin his speech on the importance of friendship or something like that.

"Nico, people care about you, and we all want whats best for you-" Jason kept droning on and lecturing him, but Nico wasn't absorbing any of it. It was a mistake to come back, he knew Jason wouldn't leave him alone, he knew it! 'Looks like I'll be moving to Japan,' he thought, 'or maybe just go back to Italy.' Too busy planning his escape, Nico didn't notice Jason had stopped talking.

Or Jason touching his arm.

Or Jason staring at the red blots appearing on his sleeve.

The one _fucking_ day he didn't wear black.

Wrenching his arm away from Jason, Nico began gathering the energy to shadow travel. Unfortunately, he wasn't fast enough and Jason tackled him to the ground. He started kicking and punching, but it was no secret that Jason was stronger than him. Somehow, Jason managed to straddle Nico, and pin one arm down. Taking the one still bleeding, he ripped the sleeve up his arm and unwrapped the gauze, revealing at least 15 self harm scars.

They sat in silence for a few moments, Nico breathing heavily and Jason analyzing the cuts. Nico had his eyes closed and was praying that somehow Jason would let him go, just leave him alone and not tell anyone. But he knew that would never happen.

"Nico look at me."

He opened his eyes to meet intense blue ones. Jason's eyes were normally like the sky, soft and free of judgement, but now they were stormy. So many emotions swirled around; anger, betrayal, confusion, pity, sadness, worry. Everything Nico wanted to avoid.

"Why?"

"You know why…" Nico whispered.

All of a sudden, Jason got up and pulled Nico with him. He led him to the bed and sat him there, then disappeared into the bathroom. Nico was surprised that Jason trusted him enough not to shadow travel away, but was even more shocked when Jason came out with medical supplies Nico kept hidden in the bathroom. Kneeling down, Jason began dressing and cleaning Nico's wounds. His touch was gentle, and it reminded Nico of the way Bianca used to stroke his hand.

"You need to be more careful. You have to clean it really good or else it will get infected." He whispered softly.

Emotion swelled inside of Nico, and before he knew it he was crying. He sobbed and gasped and choked as Jason pulled him into the first hug he's had in a long time. Normally he hates contact but he didn't have the energy to care, not now.

After a good 30 minute crying session, Nico tensed in Jason's hold, signaling that the hugging was over. When Jason pulled away, concern was all over his face. Nico looked like a mess, his eyes were puffy and he had tracks of tears on his cheeks. Ashamed, Nico tried to wipe them away as best he could, avoiding looking at Jason.

"You're going to get better. I'm going to help you."

Nico looked up to see Jason gazing at him warmly. Not even Hazel looked at him with that sort of affection.

"Why do you care?"

New tears leaked from Nico's eyes and he looked down again in embarrassment. But, then he felt someone else brush them away, and looked to see Jason smiling softly at him.

"Because I'm your friend Nico."

After a long pause Nico said, "I'm not going to get better right away."

"I know, I can be patient."

Nico raised his eyebrows, "I'm serious, Jason, it's gonna take some time."

"My best friend is Leo Valdez, Nico. I understand patience pretty well."

Nico laughed and out of the blue, Jason hugged him. Nico was tense but Jason didn't seem to care considering he kept hugging him with a soft smile on his face. After an extremely awkward five minutes, Nico cleared his throat.

"Jason?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you go now?"

"Oh! Yeah, of course, sorry-I'm sorry…"

"No! no, it's okay, I'm just really tired, and it's been a rough day, you know…"

"Yeah, no, I get it…"

Jason was standing at the door with Nico and almost walked through it before he stopped to look back at him.

"I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Yeah, see you tomorrow."

And as Jason walked away, Nico couldn't help but feel a little flutter of something stir in his heart. The kind of feeling he used to get all the time, but now only sometimes got around Hazel. Its been a long time since Nico felt like he had a friend or a home, but maybe now the feeling would return.

And maybe this time the feeling would stay.


End file.
